Ok......
So it has been a while. In fact, it has been quite a while. Well, I decided to turn over a new leaf. I decided to start using this thing more. I mean, why have it if you're not gonna use it, right? Today I start learning a healthier way of life. Yes I am one of the millions who are slowly killing themselves so I decided it was time for a change. There are a lot of things I am not so honest with myself about.
1. I have some issues
2. I am an emotional wreck
3. I have lost control of myself
4.I don't know what to do
Issues.... I am overweight. I have emotional ties with food.I don't eat because I am hungry,I eat to give myself comfort.I eat because I am stressed out. I eat because the food is there. I have a problem with anger. I blow up for no reason. I am so angry all the time it seams,it's exhausting. I am depressed. alot. No I don't know why, there is usually no reason why, I just am.Mood swings seem to be a way f life for me. It's getting old. I am very insecure. I feel like most of the time I am not as good as the next persn. I always need to please people, even if I don't really know them. If I am not super friendly and super accomodating, I feel they won't like me,,and I can't stand the thought of someone not liking me,it actually will eat at me until I feel literally sick.In my head I know it is not possible to please all people at all times, but for some reason I still feel like I need too. That is why I am an emotional wreck. I am so stressed from trying to please everyone that when I am around the people who do love me I treat them like shit. Isn't that totally off the charts?
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